If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Randomize
