Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
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