Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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