I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
A+ Viking dick
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize
