i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
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He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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