RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Randomize
