O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
