Me. At least after what I've been through.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
