shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
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