how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
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