I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
