so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
