So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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