i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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