im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
