"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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