During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
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