is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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