Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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