Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
