so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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