Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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