plz talk dirty to me
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
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