Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
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