I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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