i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
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