VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
so much tequila, so little girl.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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