I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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