To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
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I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
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In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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