I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
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