I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
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