I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
