forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
