Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
its not stalking. its research.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
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