Texts From Last Night

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  (757): View more from Virginia

  Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.

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  (757): Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever. http://tfl.nu/ml9k
  Replies (20) Good night (9677) Bad night (806)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."

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  (989): I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him." http://tfl.nu/yg5c
  Replies (9) Good night (828) Bad night (3609)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  "I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."

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  (440): "I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face." http://tfl.nu/mi59
  Replies (27) Good night (1198) Bad night (4189)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico

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  (419): Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico http://tfl.nu/934w
  Replies (18) Good night (7273) Bad night (1053)
• Favorite

  (786): View more from Florida

  i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"

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  (786): i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy" http://tfl.nu/v0t3
  Replies (6) Good night (4150) Bad night (967)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I have surprise drugs for everyone

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  (404): I have surprise drugs for everyone http://tfl.nu/7gjj
  Replies (11) Good night (2782) Bad night (908)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.

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  (774): It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world. http://tfl.nu/7olx
  Replies (16) Good night (2672) Bad night (666)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  if you just come over, i will entertain you

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment

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  (508): if you just come over, i will entertain you (484): arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment http://tfl.nu/zbb7
  Replies (5) Good night (814) Bad night (1267)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab

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  (520): you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab http://tfl.nu/m7xl
  Replies (4) Good night (1655) Bad night (732)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.

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  (907): Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman. http://tfl.nu/89v9
  Replies (14) Good night (2215) Bad night (699)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.

  (210): View more from Texas

  my parents really loved me back then.

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  (210): I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed. (210): my parents really loved me back then. http://tfl.nu/7xue
  Replies (9) Good night (1337) Bad night (461)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life

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  (518): I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life http://tfl.nu/wu65
  Replies (5) Good night (893) Bad night (326)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day

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  (613): How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day http://tfl.nu/h9s2
  Replies (1) Good night (701) Bad night (193)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with

  (1-775): View more from Nevada

  Atleast he is letting you know he will be late

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  (775): He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with (1-775): Atleast he is letting you know he will be late http://tfl.nu/exkh
  Replies (3) Good night (379) Bad night (484)
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  I almost tased myself

  (1-563): View more from Iowa

  I dont think you should own that device.

  (563): View more from Iowa

  It's an awesome device. I love this device.

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  (563): I almost tased myself (1-563): I dont think you should own that device. (563): It's an awesome device. I love this device. http://tfl.nu/0r8c
  Replies (1) Good night (510) Bad night (232)

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