Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up

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  (586): I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up http://tfl.nu/t16c
  Replies (6) Good night (856) Bad night (800)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned

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  (973): My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned http://tfl.nu/s0bf
  Replies (19) Good night (3726) Bad night (851)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Di me a solid and hit me with your car.

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  (715): Di me a solid and hit me with your car. http://tfl.nu/1rsf
  Replies (3) Good night (780) Bad night (2169)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.

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  (785): Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know. http://tfl.nu/7et1
  Replies (12) Good night (2494) Bad night (973)
• Favorite

  (636): View more from Missouri

  Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night

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  (636): Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night http://tfl.nu/yir7
  Replies (23) Good night (3336) Bad night (1624)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?

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  (613): Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots? http://tfl.nu/j4og
  Replies (6) Good night (2839) Bad night (943)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below

  (773): View more from Illinois

  When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"

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  (773): We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below (773): When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!" http://tfl.nu/bs1p
  Replies (4) Good night (1888) Bad night (626)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.

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  (773): I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal. (708): Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks. http://tfl.nu/2r2v
  Replies (9) Good night (1825) Bad night (789)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?

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  (770): Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier? http://tfl.nu/rucv
  Replies (9) Good night (1800) Bad night (604)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.

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  (604): Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over. http://tfl.nu/sa4q
  Replies (11) Good night (1539) Bad night (399)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?

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  (781): Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it? http://tfl.nu/aevy
  Replies (10) Good night (1434) Bad night (617)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.

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  (708): Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store. http://tfl.nu/aft6
  Replies (0) Good night (422) Bad night (298)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to

  (425): View more from Washington

  She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem

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  (425): He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to (425): She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem http://tfl.nu/6c1h
  Replies (0) Good night (664) Bad night (295)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands

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  (610): This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands http://tfl.nu/sjql
  Replies (3) Good night (320) Bad night (438)
• Favorite

  (575): View more from New Mexico

  Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat

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  (575): Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat http://tfl.nu/1zg9
  Replies (1) Good night (215) Bad night (427)

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