I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
