I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I'm too high and old for this...
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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