sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
