Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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