one word: firstdatebathroomanal
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
