Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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