Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
