u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
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