Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
