kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
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