I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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