If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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