Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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