My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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