this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Did you just see the Batmobile???
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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